The Pilot: Save or Sink?

PEOPLE AND THINGS THAT ARE ANNOYING &/OR FRUSTRATING
AKA P/T TA A/F*

*pronounced \ˈpit-taf\

Part I: Inspiration from a "Family Vacation"

So many of you already know that I was on a "family vacation" for about a week in Florida. I put that in quotes because I truly believe that these words should never go together...

Supposedly the whole Orlando-Disney World/ Universal Studios package is commonly described as a "dream vacation." But, this past week I have struggled to find one event to be associated with a good dream.

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Orlando, Florida is mostly a retirement/tourist area, so there are tons of people. And what does tons of people mean? --It means an intolerable migraine for me, but an enjoyable blog post for you.

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The Road Trip:

OK first and foremost, make sure if you ever go on a road trip to make sure that the people you go with are tolerable... I went with my parents and my two younger cousins. *sigh* Let's not talk about them, because I might pull out every strand of hair out of my head...and I can't afford Bosley Hair Restoration... So, let me just complain about everyone else besides my family.

1. People who drive slow on the left/fast lane- Why is it that some drivers insist on driving the exact same speed as the car in the right lane? This royally pisses me off because people apparently cannot comprehend this sign:


Maybe it's the caps that messes people up.... Caps usually indicates yelling or shouting, so maybe people are not submissive to authority... Whatever the reason, here's the bottom line: Get over!

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A day at the amusement park:

During my time spent in Florida the weather can be described as many things, but only one thing comes to mind...hot. Even though it is natural for people to sweat due to the heat, I still believe that people should understand how to keep their hygiene in check...

2. People who have unbearable body odor- C'mon people is deodorant and/or anti-perspiration really too much to ask for?

I understand that when doing strenuous activities or being out in the sun leads to sweat and sometimes sweat leads to odor. But, there is a line between a natural odor to foul stank! If a person walks by and it causes another person to grimace...I'm sorry, but that's disgusting. And with all of my luck, I seem to always be in line behind these said people. It's true that after time one gets used to the smell, but with just a little breeze of air or wind... that pungent smell comes right back. I seriously almost passed out after 25 minutes of standing in line. The biggest shocker is that these people have no knowledge to the stench they are passing to my nostrils. If you think I am an oblivious scent pollutant, PLEASE TELL ME....So I can scorch my skin to scar close all of my pores...

3. People who hold hands in high-traffic/volume areas- The whole "couples" thing is cute and all, but it is not necessary to stay attached 24 hours of the day.


I mean loads of cash is spent to separate Siamese/conjoined twins, so I think letting go of your girl/boyfriend's clammy hand for 2 seconds won't cause a spontaneous combustion. With the thousands of people at Disney each day, when people hold hands the whole time, it really turns into an inconvenience. One reason being that, they expect you to go around them. This gets annoying fast, because who decided that two people with embraced hands have precedence over one person for space? Is this written somewhere? Because if not, I'm going to start playing Red Rover every chance I get. Well, at least those couples will have a random story to tell when they return home. It might go something like this: "It was our last day at Disney World, and we were just strolling through the park holding hands....Then suddenly, this random Asian girl charged at us and came between us and started laughing hysterically while pumping her hands in the air saying, "I win, I win." That wasn't even the strangest part.... The weird thing was that she didn't have some kind of Oriental accent..."

Oh, burn... damn society's stereotypes... I can never win, not even in my own fictional blog-story... Let's move on shall we?

4. People who cut in line- Lots of people + few popular attractions = long-ass lines.

Waiting in line may be a pain, but I think it's fair. You wait your ass in line or pay extra for some sort of "fast pass." I don't know about youse guys, but I refuse to pay to jump a line. So, first come, means first served right? Wrong. There always has to be those idiots who have to ruin it by cutting in line. Surprisingly, when this occurs usually people tend not to say anything to them. But, tight lips is not one of my father's traits. I'd like to think of myself of having a pretty level head, and if something bothers me I tend to politely ask someone to not do something or I bury it inside until it irritates the hell out of me and I blow...haha either way when the occurrence originally happens, I don't yell at anyone. My dad on the other hand, I think likes to yell aimlessly at people every chance he gets. He has a loud voice and can be scary, but I don't think anything he says while yelling is understandable... There was a group of teenage boys who attempted to cut in line in front of us and this is what I made out of what my father said to them, "Aye yai yai! Hey! rrrrrgggrrr You!....This is the line! rrggeeerrrrgggeekajfairu NO CUTS!!! brraaahhhhgaaarrrr. GO!" ....give or take a few words... Anyway, it apparently is effective, because the boys got wide-eyed and left. My father did a little laugh of self-accomplishment and I just shook my head while we scooched up 3 feet in line. Oh, dad...you're such a good role model.

Here's another goody about my pop... Remember how I stated in a previous post that my dad is a "funny guy?" Well, he thinks it's hilarious to memorize where the cameras take your picture during a ride and then the next time he rides it, he flashes "the bird." Thanks to my father, the goofy kid riding on the same train can't spend 10 bucks on a key chain sized pic of him/her with their eyes closed shut. Classy....

5. When people don't walk on moving walkways- The key word here is, "walkway."

This should immediately indicate that you indeed walk on a walkway... The only exception to this of course is if you have an inability to walk, and if this is the case then please move off to one side and hold on to the rail while moving negative 5 miles an hour. This is directly related to how people drive slow in the fast lane, except this is with walking or not walking. How can people decide to stand on a conveyor belt? These people must have all the time in the world to just stand around. How do they get anywhere? Ironically, I bet these same people are the ones who never have time to take 2 seconds to flush a toilet.

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So, this was the first of my P/T TA A/F list.... What do you all think? Should I continue on this post?

Tell me your thoughts by clicking HERE.